If a young woman in middle school or high school hangs up a poster of Barack Obama in her room, this is seen as acceptable. It’s fine for women to admire men and want to be like them.
If a young man (the same age) hangs up a poster of Hillary Clinton in his room, this is seen as odd (maybe even troubling, is he gay? Oh no!).
Society tells us young men can’t think of women as role models, unless they’re a family member, whereas young women can admire and seek to emulate anyone, regardless of gender.
If you’re a young man, and if you have a poster on your wall with a woman, she had better be half-naked in a bikini, even if the Ronald Reagan or Gen. Patton poster next to it obviously features the man fully-clothed.
Young men are not to taught to think of women as role models. They are taught to think of them as either family members or sexual objects. There is no other category presented."
A few people have alerted me to this video of toddlers and you can watch as a little boy hugs a little girl multiple times and each time he does, she pushes him away. A few of the times, he seems to be prompted to continue by the person with the camera. It’s a full two minutes and nothing changes – he hugs her, she pushes him away, he gets up and hugs her again and she pushes him away again.
Clearly this isn’t street harassment because they know each other and it isn’t sexual harassment because they’re toddlers and don’t have an understanding of all that, but it is a problematic situation in which adults are standing by and letting (encouraging?) this little boy to do something the girl doesn’t want him to do and then instead of helping her use her words to tell him to stop, they’re letting her push him down over and over.
The Good Men Project linked to the video via the How to Be a Dad’s site, where the author labels the post “My Life with Women” and writes, “This one symbolizes every attempt I’ve ever made at relationships with the fairer sex… …. …. until my wife.”
The he writes, “I could be the misogynist here and make some comments about just how badly the lady little treats this fine, young man, but women are pretty great. Maybe this kid needs to get a job, buy a sweet ride (Power Wheels, perhaps?) and learn some Karate, proving himself a worthy love interest?”
And I find that very problematic. Implying that this little toddler and all women who reject men are stuck-up, bitchy, and only after good-looking or rich men is harmful. Instead of looking at the actions and saying, this girl doesn’t want to be hugged, they are focusing on the poor boy and how mean she is. She may have 10 reasons or only 1 for why she doesn’t want to be hugged by him and all of them are valid and should be respected.
No means no, even when you’re a toddler. Especially when you’re a toddler. Fifteen percent of sexual assault and abuse victims are under age 12. Teaching kids how to protect themselves at a very young age is crucial to helping them know how to prevent or get help if they are victimized and can teach them skills they can use all of their life.
This attitude that women owe men attention no matter what contributes to how, when some men are ignored or rejected by the women they harass on the street, they call them a bitch, a ho, throw trash at them, chase them, or tell them they were ugly anyway. Instead of thinking logically about all the reasons why a woman may not respond positively to a man who hollers at her on the street, men feel it is an affront on their masculinity and lash out.
Another problematic aspect of the video is the number of people who applauded how persistent the kid is. Some people in the comments of posts talked about being disappointed he never got her in the end. Guess what, you don’t always “get the girl” in the end. No means no! 1,006,970 women and 370,990 men are stalked annually in the U.S. We need to teach kids, especially boys because they are the bulk of the stalkers, not to follow or keep hugging etc women and girls who clearly don’t want that attention.
So those are my thoughts on the video, what are yours?
(via thesexuneducated)Source: captain-sonic
What every traditional, real American family should look like :)
COOL!!! Now let me add in some other examples of what a healthy, happy, traditional, real American family should BE ABLE to look like:
Mexican and South American families
Middle Eastern families
East Asian families
South Asian families
Native American families
Interracial families of all colors
Atheist or agnostic families
Single mother families
Single father families
Grandparents raising a family
Gay parent families
Lesbian parent families
Transgender parent families
Families with special needs children
Families with disabled children
Families with disabled parents
Families with deaf/hard of hearing parents, deaf/hard of hearing children, or both
Awwww, aren’t they all adorable? :3
I know I probably left a lot of folks out, so feel free to add pictures of what a good, happy, true American family can be! Remember they come in all shapes, sizes, colors, ages, genders, religions, races, cultures, nationalities, sexualities, and appearances, so don’t leave anyone out! Especially when you VOTE. The only thing that defines what makes a family is love. <3
My, isn’t America wonderful~?
EDIT: And you know, I just wanted to add…you can send Rick Santorum and the rest of the country, even the rest of the world, the message that these families and other families that went unmentioned matter TOO, NOT just white, conservative, Christian, straight-parent, double-parent, rich, privileged families like his. Let him and the country know that ALL families have a say, ALL families are what define America, ALL families are what make this nation strong, ALL families matter, ALL families are important, and that ALL families deserve a CHANCE.
Let Rick Santorum know that OUR children deserve the chance to go to college, NOT just his.
Let Rick Santorum know that OUR children deserve to marry whoever they want, NOT just his.
Let Rick Santorum know that WE deserve to marry whoever we fall in love with, NOT just him and his wife Karen.
Let Rick Santorum know that OUR wives and girlfriends deserve to have life-saving abortions/miscarriages/whatever he chooses to call it, NOT just his.
Let Rick Santorum know that OUR special needs and disabled children deserve to have money that can help improve their lives, NOT just his daughter.
Let Rick Santorum know that threatening OUR families will NOT be tolerated, and that WE are the ones who believe in what America TRULY is, a place where ANY family can be free and happy.
Let Rick Santorum know that his family will NOT become the royal figureheads of a medieval theocracy where church and state are bound as one.
Let Rick Santorum know that marriage is as old as humanity and that HIS religion did NOT invent the concept and he can NOT force his definition of it on us.
Let Rick Santorum know that OUR women matter, OUR women should have a say over their own bodies, and that OUR women deserve to be LOVED in any way we see fit.
Let Rick Santorum know that OUR families deserve medical help, OUR parents deserve fair wages and fair pay, OUR parents deserve places in the work force, that OUR single mothers and single fathers and disabled parents are not to be shut out by greedy executives and CEOs who only seek to expand their own paycheck and give NOTHING back to their own employees or society at large.
Let Rick Santorum know that he is WRONG for excluding OUR families, that he is a BIGOT no matter how hard he tries to deny it, and that without OUR families working and toiling away beneath families like his, America would NOT be the rich and powerful country it is today.
Let Rick Santorum know that WE are America and that WE DON’T WANT HIM.
VOTE AGAINST SANTORUM AND OTHER HATEFUL MEN LIKE HIM.
A VOTE AGAINST THEM IS A VOTE FOR FAMILY IN ALL OF ITS FORMS.
A VOTE AGAINST THEM IS A VOTE FOR WHAT AMERICA REALLY IS: A LAND OF THE FREE, A LAND OF HARD-WORKING FAMILIES, A LAND OF EQUAL OPPORTUNITY, A LAND OF FAIR PLAY AND ASSISTING THOSE IN NEED, A LAND THAT DOES NOT SHUT OUT ITS POOR AND DENIES ITS CITIZENS THEIR RIGHTS, A LAND THAT DOES NOT LET BIGOTS LIKE RICK SANTORUM INTO THE WHITE HOUSE.
FAMILIES ARE PEOPLE, NOT CORPORATIONS.
FAMILIES ARE PEOPLE, NOT THEOCRACIES.
FAMILIES ARE PEOPLE, NOT RICK SANTORUM.
THIS THIS THIS
The following day, I attended a workshop about preventing gender violence, facilitated by Katz. There, he posed a question to all of the men in the room: “Men, what things do you do to protect yourself from being raped or sexually assaulted?”
Not one man, including myself, could quickly answer the question. Finally, one man raised his hand and said, “Nothing.” Then Katz asked the women, “What things do you do to protect yourself from being raped or sexually assaulted?” Nearly all of the women in the room raised their hand. One by one, each woman testified:
“I don’t make eye contact with men when I walk down the street,” said one.
“I don’t put my drink down at parties,” said another.
“I use the buddy system when I go to parties.”
“I cross the street when I see a group of guys walking in my direction.”
“I use my keys as a potential weapon.”
The women went on for several minutes, until their side of the blackboard was completely filled with responses. The men’s side of the blackboard was blank. I was stunned. I had never heard a group of women say these things before. I thought about all of the women in my life — including my mother, sister and girlfriend — and realized that I had a lot to learn about gender."